Surviving H1N1 (Online Classes)

Posted by ERUDIO in Inspiration on Oct 27th, 2009

In the morning, you felt fine. You are dead that afternoon. You sneeze, you cough, you have to lie down, your lungs fill with your own fluids, and you drown.

Our bodies are cruise ships for germs, having the party of their lives.--- Kurt Vonnegut

You’re sitting in a lecture. Or studying in your dorm. Or eating in the cafeteria. Someone sneezes. You kiss someone. You touch a doorknob and rub your eye. You have invited death into your body. And it parties down hard until nothing is left of you.

The last time H1N1 came at us, it killed 100 million people worldwide. And it’s coming again. It’s coming straight at YOU, college student.

It’s appetites are horribly perverse. It’s a molester. It kills mostly the young. Expectant mothers, it loves to kill. Children. Young athletes.

Old people? H1N1, for some perverse reason, doesn’t really want them. It likes its victims young and fresh and healthy.

And it knows how to find you.

At your college, every classroom is a petri dish. Every surface is a launching pad for hungry life forms. You can pick up a virus by touching something with the virus on it and then touching your mouth, nose or eyes.

flu germs

Flu germs can live for hours on surfaces like phones, desks, counters, tables and doorknobs. It will transfer into your car, your home.

Know this. You are food. The virus wants to move in and eat you. You are part of a biomass exposed to a deadly culture of disease germs.

Arm yourself with info. Flu viruses are usually spread when an infected person coughs or sneezes. Infected droplets can land on a person or surface within six feet.

Stay away from crowds and potentially infected areas. Use online classes whenever possible, and stay home.

But what if you can’t? If you can’t do online classwork, if you are forced to be in class, to do your class work, then you have no choice. How do you protect yourself? How do you survive?

Wear a mask? Wearing a mask is not going to keep the germs out of your nostrils and mouth. Masks are only helpful for those infected already, so that their sneezes do not project the germ masses into aerobic sprays.

Close up of H1N1 vaccine

You can’t even be sure who has the virus, by looking.

In fact, the H1N1 virus has been found 100% active, in the nostrils of people who have had the virus, and seem to have completely recovered.

One kiss and the virus moves into it’s new hotel.

So. You need your classes. You want to graduate. You have to enter the petri dish.

What measures might protect you?

Here is your GRAD2B H1N1 CHECKLIST

1 Wash your hands often, vigorously with soap, for at least 20 seconds.
2 Carry an alcohol gel with alcohol at least 60% concentration or more. Use it often. Rub hard until your hands are completely dry of gel.
3 Never touch your face with your fingers. NEVER.
4 NEVER eat out, prepare your own meals, avoid buffets like the plague… no pun intended.
5 Cover your coughs and sneezes with a tissue. Throw the tissue away when you are done. Always clean your hands afterward.
6 Practice “social distancing.” Okay, you love to hang out. But you love to live too, right? Avoid crowds. Keeping a distance of three to six feet from others if you can.
7 Wipe down your study area with alcohol wipes several times a day, including your chair, mouse, keyboard.
8 NEVER use other people’s phone, computer, I-pod, etc etc.
9 Online classes protect you from exposure. Your laptop can’t sneeze on you.